Within society it is deemed advantageous and morally acceptable to have a significantly larger social circle, whether in actuality or via social media. We often sacrifice our own happiness, integrity and privacy in life to acquiesce in befriending yet another individual whom we place our invested trust in. Some individuals have deeper seated trust issues and acceptance tendancies than others given that is how human nature operates. “I’d rather be hated for who I am, than loved for who I am not” Kurt Cobain once stated. In essense, we often place our own happiness in others hands then invariably question our conscious as to why we are unhappy thereafter. Reading between the lines rather than judging that individuals purpose, intentions and values prior to letting them in your life is paramount.
In 2016, the revolving door in friendship and association has greater brevity than generations previously. There are friends which strictly need you based on necessity, advance and materialistic gain. These people are affectionately known universally as leeches. It makes such characters feel very good about themselves inside, rather than how great the bond is collectively. A true friend will not preserve themselves and their intentions. A true friend will not approach you when it suits their needs. A true friend will not expect nothing, but essentially give more. It is a two way street in relationships, friendships and business partnerships. How would you generally feel if a friend ate all of your food inside of your home, yet never reciprocated in returning the same deed when they invited you into their own abode?
If transparency in their role and intentions are made perfectly clear during the bond, then it should not come into question as to the echelon of our friendships and social circle. Their credibility and authenticity will not be remotely met with any wild caution. Undeniably, individuals need to feel empowered to stand up and look in the mirror and state “Enough is enough. It is time to draw the line” in relation to those which bring you personal unhappiness, negative thoughts and neglect. This is a form of the devil’s children doing work in disguise. There is no reason to hold onto nor salvage a feeling, individual or moment that has now outgrown your prosperity moving forward. People evolve before our very eyes, and so do their motives. Less is more in friendships as we invest in reliable quality over sheer quantity. The quantity which are in our lives are simply a statistic. You are more than just a statistic. You are in control. You have to stand up for what you believe in. You have to not be afraid of letting go.
Heavily invest in your current friendships and relationship, whilst questioning them on anything without being invasive or disrespectful. Your good friends will appreciate honest qualities which will create a bond that will erradicate the tendancies of walking on eggshells. Nobody likes a smarmy, one-dimensional, repetitive conversation. Always keep things fresh, fun and vibrant. They will respect you even more as a human being. Reclaim your inner self which disappeared long ago. Don’t feel any remorse in letting go of people in your life. Ask yourself another major question to yourself right now: “Would they run the additional mile for me as I have for them?“. The fruits of a friendship goes beyond personal favors, rather those which are based upon unity, unconditional love, mutual respect and respectfully regular communication. There is no resentment, envy or jealousy as they accept you for who and what you are at your very core. If a friend doesn’t answer your calls, texts or social media messages, this can often lead to miscommunication in that we are being ignored or unappreciated, which in turn leads to ego and/or entitlement taking over before our eyes. We believe they are being arrogant, not efficient or unresponsive. Remain patient and find a way to richly engage with them. There is nothing better than a face to face meeting or telephone conversation as social media cannot always be gaged correctly in regards to communication. If after numerous attempts there appears to be zero response, the chances are that individual may not be thinking about you as much as you think about them. Be bold. Be assertive. Be daring. Be yourself. Ask these individuals if everything is fine and then explain to them how you truly feel about your perceived once close bond now withering.
Moreover, less is indeed more in a social circle. There are those who like to see you do well, but hate it when you are doing better than them. Friends can turn against you in a heartbeat, and will make no apologies about it. Life is a journey, not a competition. It’s not a prize, rather a gift. Above all else, adjust your foggy vision and inform yourself that you will do so much better when the needy, insincere and unreliable people are gone forever in your life. You truly deserve so much better and you can find the strength within to do this today. Let it go and understand that less is indeed more.
W| By Dean Perretta #InspireLSRelationships
