Many people hold the perception that actresses and women in the media spotlight live the best lives; and it is often forgotten that they too battle with their own personal demons and deal with personal setbacks. Ex Hollyoaks Actress and Model Mel Wells is a prime example of one woman who had to overcome her issues with body image and a devastating eating disorder that affected the way she treated and loved herself. However, Mel was able to turn her life around and create a unique method to help her not only change her relationship with food but also conquer her eating disorder once and for all. Today, Mel is the author of the brand new book ‘The Goddess Revolution, Make Peace with Food, Love Your Body and Reclaim Your Life’ (Review coming soon to In-spire LS) In this exclusive interview, Mel talks about her issues with food, how she reclaimed her life and took charge of her body image, shares why she wrote The Goddess Revolution and let’s us know why she is dedicated to spreading awareness to high profile women in the media so they can positively influence women the world over… Prepared to be In-spired…..
Hi Mel, Thank you for speaking with In-spire LS Magazine. Your story is a very inspirational one that many women around the world can relate to. You had a successful career on TV; with a lead role on Hollyoaks as well as working as a model. However, behind the glitz and the glamour you were battling your own personal demons. How and why did you develop eating disorders and what turn of events took place within your life to cause you to begin regaining control of your life?
Like many young impressionable teenagers, I developed insecurities about my body and began dieting. But I took it too far, and became obsessed with shrinking and becoming smaller. I was always a high achiever and a perfectionist, and this was just something to obsess over. It took over my life and I felt like it was controlling me. It took me 6 years to find myself again. It was a slow and steady journey, but one that I am extremely proud of. Unfortunately it took my father passing away suddenly to wake me up and remember that life is short, and we should be taking care of our bodies with good nutrition and health. And it took realising that I wanted to be a mum more than I wanted to lose weight – to begin to actually start treating my body with love. I only started doing that when I wanted to create a healthy body to conceive a baby in. But what happened when I made that shift in my mindset was transformational for me.
During your period of evaluation and implementing positive lifestyle changes into your life you developed a unique method to heal the damage done to your body and to evidently heal yourself from the inside out. When you initially began to turn your life around, how easy or difficult was the transition period and how did you deal with it overall?
It was extremely wobbly at the beginning because I was living in a place where my worst fear in the world was gaining a few pounds. I was terrified that if I stopped abusing my body and ‘quit’ my eating disorder and tried to eat ‘normally’, I would gain loads of weight and feel hideous. I was completely reliant on my scales so I did what I knew I needed to do – I threw them out. This forced me to actually listen to my body and eat the foods that I knew made me feel good. It was a huge learning curve for me. I had been disconnected from my body for so long and hadn’t been listening at all. Now I was actually working with my body as a team, rather than fighting against her. My body found her natural balance, at a healthy weight where she can thrive, and I’ve never felt better. Everything started falling into place and I started recognising tools and lessons I was learning that could help others out of their battles too.
We live in a ‘social media’ driven world where we are continually shown images of society’s idea of ‘perfection’ from overly airbrushed celebrities to women practically killing themselves to fit these standards. You could have easily focused entirely on changing your own life but you instead made it your mission to bring your innovative practises that enable women to take charge of the negative thought patterns and associations they have with food. Why was it so important for you to pay it forward?
Because I genuinely thought that I would be stuck in that awful relationship with food and my body forever. I thought this was just me, and how it would be for the rest of my life. I can’t even begin to describe how incredible it is to have complete freedom – it makes me cry just thinking about how grateful I am for it. It’s an incredible gift and every woman should have it. As far as I can see the ‘help’ out there for disordered eating or a bad relationship with your body is not very extensive or psychological, and GPs and therapists are not addressing the core issues or understanding what it’s actually like to be going through it yourself. I can quite confidently say that I have been there, I have lived it, and I have come out the other side more happy than I ever thought possible. Every woman who’s ever struggled with food or her body needs to hear this. I am just the messenger for a message much more powerful.
I’m in love with the title of your upcoming book ‘The Goddess Revolution’. Why did you choose this title and in your opinion; in its full embodiment, what defines a ‘Goddess’?
Thank you! Every woman is a Goddess – from birth. But along the way, we pick up stories and beliefs from society and comparison that tells us we aren’t enough, we need to change ourselves, we need to fix ourselves before we’re allowed to claim our ‘happy’. When you’re at peace with food and you learn how to really LOVE your body – and by LOVE – I mean, trust, respect, communication, loyalty – all the things a good relationship requires – amazing things can happen. This is a revolution – it’s not a diet and there are no rules, just principles and mindset shifts that can completely change your life.
When changing the way you felt about food and your unhealthy relationship with it; you must have taken a great amount of time to read up on food and the different ways that it can be used to heal the body. What guides or health visionaries/practitioners or authors did you turn to help you understand the changes you were implementing?
Honestly – no. I was sick of reading every expert’s advice on food and the body. I was overwhelmed at how conflicting everything on the internet was about what we should and shouldn’t be eating. I decided to stop listening to other experts, and instead become the expert of my own body. This is what I encourage all my Goddesses to do. Nobody knows your body like YOU do. Stop clinging to everyone else for advice – and start to actually trust the wisdom of your own body. Our bodies are so much wiser than we give them credit for. Everything that I teach my Goddesses is what I have learned for myself from the communication I have with my body. Of course, I studied nutrition for a long time – but none of what I teach is based in science. Everything is what I know to have worked from my own experiences.
Dedicating your time to your new path meant that we no longer saw you acting or modelling. Was it an easy way to leave acting behind at embark on your new journey full time?
It was the easiest decision of my life, and I knew that because it felt like such a relief to let it go. I have never felt more passionate about what I do now, and I have never felt more of an urgency to spread this message. My darkest times have become the message I am here to share, so I absolutely had to go through all of that to be where I am today. It really was a blessing. I don’t miss the acting world at all. I have never felt more fulfilled being able to actually help women end the war on their bodies and transform their lives. I can’t describe the feeling.
“Every woman is a Goddess – from birth. But along the way, we pick up stories and beliefs from society and comparison that tells us we aren’t enough”
Many people who have moved away from a negative way of life have also had to rid themselves of other forms of baggage that played their role in hindering their progress. Did you lose friends or colleagues as a result of embarking on a healthier path?
Yes – and the more I loved myself, the more love I was able to give to those around me. The less judgemental I became of myself, the less judgmental I became of others. You can’t love and judge someone at the same time – there’s no room for both. I found myself attracting people to me that also had a lot of love to give. Any people in my life who were judgmental or negative, simply dropped away. It’s a very natural process of change as we go through life. It’s nothing to be upset about – it just means you’re growing and evolving.
You went to the states; New York to be precise to train at The Institute of Integrative Nutrition. How important was it for you to take your learning further by obtaining an accreditation and what was the overall experience like?
I loved this training – but I need to be clear, when I trained in nutrition, I was still harbouring my eating disorder. I hoped that training in nutrition would help me fix it. But it didn’t actually. It just made me obsess over what was healthy and what was not. I became terrified of any food that was not within my perfect set of rules. It was only when I changed my approach to my own body that I was able to heal my relationship with food. I could have swallowed every nutrition book in the world but what I was missing was Love.
Was writing ‘The Goddess Revolution’ a learning curve for you or did you take the process of writing a book with ease?
To be honest this message is ingrained in me through and through, I know my work inside out so the book was a natural progression for me to do. Actually putting everything into order and on paper though was another story, especially when your publisher gives you 12 weeks to do it in!
Your coaching practices has garnered a great amount of celebrity support from talents including Coronation Street’s Helen Flanagan and Ashley James. How proud are you of the strides and reach you have attained in a relatively short amount of time?
I’m very proud, but there is so much more work to do. I want to reach as many celebrities and people in the public eye as possible with this message, because these are the role models that young women are pinning up and admiring, and looking at for guidance. These people are the ones that are determining how women in the world feel about themselves. These people are the ones in the magazines being talked about – including about their food, weight, body etc. If I can change the way celebrities think of their bodies and feel about themselves that will spread to the public in big waves of compassion and love.
Not only are you preparing for the launch of ‘The Goddess Revolution’ book in June but you are also leading not one but two female-only wellness retreats in Bali 2016. How did you get involved in heading up these retreats and if our readers were ever to go to your retreat events; what could they expect?
Yes! I love hosting retreats! Our retreats are full of self love, amazing cooking workshops by our incredible chef Jay, and plenty of me-time and adventure!
I’m lucky enough to be reviewing your book for the #Bookkorner of In-spire LS but before that, in no more than one sentence, why is ‘The Goddess Revolution’ worth the investment?
It’s not if the book is worth the investment – the question is are YOU worth the investment? The answer is yes. Yes you are!
Before you leave us; for those women out there who are desperate to take charge of their lives and love themselves and their bodies what pearls of wisdom can you offer them?
Start communicating with your body and asking her how she feels and how you can best support her. Stop agonising over your reflection and start actually focusing on how you feel instead of how you look. Stop dieting, stop tracking, stop counting, and start living. Your relationship with food is a teacher for you – you are here to live a purposeful, soulful life!
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‘The Goddess Revolution, Make Peace with Food, Love Your Body and Reclaim Your Life’ by Mel Wells (Hay House) is OUT NOW!
For more information on Mel visit:
W| By Sasha Shantel
